Counseling Center Referral

How to Make a Referral

It is difficult to watch someone you know and care about be in distress. Whether this individual is a friend, colleague, or student, sometimes it is confusing to know how to help a person who is struggling with life problems, be they physical or emotional. The following is a list of suggestions to help refer someone to the Health and Counseling Center.

1. Know your limits

From the outset, think about what role you feel comfortable playing in the current situation. While expressing your concern or confronting someone about his or her problem may entail challenging yourself to do something you do not do every day, it is important to respect your feelings about what boundaries will be necessary for you to feel comfortable. For example, you may feel comfortable giving someone information about the Health and Counseling Center and walking them over to the center, but not sitting in with them during their first counseling session to give them support or providing them with your home phone number and an invitation to call at any time.

Additionally, ask yourself whether you are approaching the person of concern as a friend, supervisor, or professional colleague, and how you may act differently given the definition of your relationship. Be aware of any ethical or legal issues that may impact your assistance. For instance, if you are a supervisor, make sure you have a good understanding about what issues you discuss with your supervisee will be confidential. Remember, it is not your responsibility to become this person's therapist or doctor. If you want to assist this individual, the best thing to do for them is to make sure they receive the professional help that they need.
If you begin to feel that your limits are being exceeded while you are helping someone, or you are unclear as to what your limits should be, call the Health and Counseling Center (303.871.2205) to consult with a professional.

2. Practice

Practice what it is you would like to say to the person. This may also include obtaining some resources that you can give the person if you feel it is appropriate. For example, you may want to have the number and location of the HCC, a brochure on their services, and perhaps a pamphlet on the issue with which you feel the person is struggling. These can be obtained by contacting the HCC. Do not underestimate the importance of giving the person good information. Frequently such pamphlets and brochures are kept for a long time and offer a reminder to the person that you are concerned, help exists, and others experience similar difficulties.

3. Express your concern

Find a place where you and the individual you are concerned about can speak privately and without distraction. Begin by expressing that you are concerned about them. A small, but important, conversational technique that can be used is beginning your statements with "I". This places the focus on what your are noticing, feeling, and experiencing, as opposed to what the individual of concern is doing, making for a less threatening situation. For example, saying "I've been worried about your health for several months now because you don't seem to be eating at mealtimes and it appears that you've lost a lot of weight" is better than saying "You're not eating! I've seen you. I have a cousin who is anorexic and you look just like her."

4. Offer your assistance

Express that you are willing to help in "whatever way I can". This statement allows you to keep the limits you have set for yourself. For example, if a person states that he or she would like to meet with you one on one for counseling, you can explain to them: "I explained that I would help in whatever way I can. I'm not able to help in that way because I am not professionally trained but I can help in other ways"[explain how you can help].

Make sure you ask them if they would like your assistance. "I'm concerned about you, would you like some help from me?" is often an easy way to ask such a question. A person may not want your assistance with the matter at hand because he or she wishes to keep the issue private, is already seeking help, or is simply shy. Determine from the beginning what it is you would like to hear, or if you are a supervisor, what you may need to hear, in order to feel that the person is safe and getting the assistance he or she needs.

5. Provide your assistance

While this may sound like an obvious step, it is important to realize that once you have offered your assistance it is vital that you follow-up on your offers. This may entail putting some of your other priorities and obligations on hold. For example, if you have offered to walk the person over to the HCC, make sure that you do not have to be at the airport in an hour to catch a flight. Similarly, if you offer to help the person find community resources on substance abuse treatment centers, make sure that you have the time and can expend the effort to do so quickly. Do not offer something that you cannot do, because if the individual of concern feels let down by you, he or she may expect disappointment from other helpers and be that much more reluctant seek assistance in the future. This having been said, remember that you have certain limits as well, and you should feel comfortable establishing reasonable boundaries with the individual of concern. If the person says he wants you to help him find resources this moment, and you have an important meeting that cannot be cancelled, offer a reasonable alternative and follow through on the offer (e.g. "I can't help you find resources at this moment, but I'd be happy to have some resources for you by the end of the day, tomorrow, etc.").

Please be aware that an individual's treatment at the HCC is strictly confidential and you will not be provided any information about that person's treatment or even if they received services or not without the individual's signed consent.

6. Consult if needed

As was mentioned at the beginning, if you need help with how to approach or assist an individual of concern, do not hesitate to contact professionals at the HCC 303.871.2205.